Tuesday, April 17, 2007

Crazy Keith's Corner: A Fun Novella

"I think you're actually having a good time tonight." --Gary Cohen

"I am--I'm just so cold." --Keith Hernandez

Those two lines summed up the return of the three man booth tonight on SNY. Another Mets blowout, another chance for Gary, Keith and Ron Darling to get goofy. And with a game played in a wind chill that was below freezing and lasted three and a half hours, there was a whole cheese steak worth of goofiness in Philly.

--Tom Glavine, who racked up win number 293, gives ex-players nightmares of being at the plate
Keith: "Glavine would give me fits. I'd be yelling at him."

--Sometimes even having a multiple highlighters to keep score isn't enough
Gary (after a rundown play on a botch suicide squeeze): "That's 2-5-6-4 if you're scoring at home."
Keith: "I'm not not."
Gary: "Yes you are!"
Keith: "No, I protest."

--Keith loves, Keith hates
Keith: "These are the games you love on getaway day; the games you love to hate."

--Keith doesn't nap during games...and doesn't like promos
Gary: "With the wind blowing in from left tonight you can't doze."
Keith: "I don't doze--why don't you read your promo. (Gary laughs) Do you want me to read your promo?"
Gary: "Sure"
Keith: (Pause after grabbing card) "Wow, that's a long one." (Keith proceeds to read the entire promo about watching games via Mets.com, then lets out a huge sigh) "Whew, my goodness, what is this? It's a novella!"

--Keith isn't a fan of the Ask the Booth feature
Gary: "[This fan] asks, 'Keith, do you think Jose Reyes could hit 30 home runs, steal 60 bases and hit 30 triples?'"
Keith: "Well, if he hits 30 triples, I'm the future King of England."

On the non-goofy side, we also discovered that Gary's favorite announcer was Marv Albert, Ron loved listening to Johnny Most doing Celtics games, while Keith was partial to Lon Simmons growing up.

(I think you know who my favorite announcers are.)


Jonah said...

thanks for the recap! missed the game and the AP writeup just doesn't cover the holy trinity closely enough.

the holy trinity, of course, being gary, keith and ron...

Anonymous said...

I love how Keith, a tough SOB as a player, is such a hothouse flower in the booth. Ron Darling intones in the 6th inning "And Keith breaks out the woolly socks!" and Keith whines "My feet are cold!" Looking at people wrapped up in blankets in the stands, Keith says "Why don't they just go home?"

Keith and Ron dropping in the odd Spanish words. Repeated "Mucho frio" from Keith, or course. Ron says Joe Black has such a "cherubic" face, but is "el diablo" on the mound.

Near the end, Ron and Gary wondering how many people are still watching the blowout on TV, or have turned it off- or fallen asleep. For the sleepy, Gary says "Sound the trumpets!" Ron adds, a la Montgomery Burns, "Release the hounds!"