Wednesday, May 09, 2007

Crazy Keith's Corner: No Sampson Here

(Heard during the first inning of last night's not-so-hairy game)
Keith: Delilah, forget about it!
Gary: No Sampson's on this ball club!

What can you say about a game that featured most of the Mets with shaved heads and SNY reporter Kevin Burkhardt in a kayak? I laughed so hard most of the game I found it hard to take notes. I did catch Keith saying repeatedly that he would not have shaved off his hair, but that he would have "met them half-way and shaved off my moustache." Gary came up with the perfect follow-up question: when was the last time Keith shaved off the 'stache? Keith replied, "I shaved it once in '88 and I promptly grew it back. I shaved it off for some stupid reason. What a mistake."

And Burkhardt seems to be Keith's new whipping boy. Just check out this exchange when the kayak was out in McCovey Cove:
Keith: "Your wife called, she wants to make sure that you made sure she's the beneficiary of your life insurance policy."
Kevin: "Gee, thanks for the confidence in me brother."

We'll be going quiet again for a few days--I can't hear the game at work today; I have company in town Friday through Sunday and then I'm going to Monday's game, taking someone who's never been to a major league game, which ought to be a treat for both of us.


Anonymous said...

Wednesday afternoon- Keith demurs at Reyes's pas de deux with whatever Met crosses the plate. "I wish they'd take that into the dugout." Gary pounces! "You guys-- were hated!! You were the most hatable team in baseball! What about those curtain calls?"

Keith sputters a bit, then turns around and blames Le Grand Orange. When he first came to the Mets, midseason, and hit his first homerun, "Rusty said 'You gotta take a curtain call here,' and pushed me out of the dugout!"

I could just hear my mom saying, "If Rusty told you to jump off the Whitestone Bridge . . . "

Gary returns to his point. "But you were hated! You were really hated!"

"Of course we were," Keith agrees, calm again. "We had Gary Carter and Wally Backman. How could you like us?"

Anonymous said...

Monday night-- Oh no he didn't! Keith goes un-PC again. Easely and Green do a dance of death in short right, and Keith deplores that nobody asserted himself. "There's gotta be an alpha male out there."

I did a near-perfect spit-take.

A lot of time was spent digging Lou Piniella's constant state of near meltdown-- Keith explains it. "He's Portuguese! He's got hot Latin blood!" The question is are they going to get letters, or is everybody just getting used to Keith?

I actually hope not. I LMAO (again) at this piece in The Onion last year:

You've gotta admire Gary Cohen, who just goes calmly on, feeding Mex the straight lines.

NB the Three were back together in the booth for the first time in several weeks.